Song meaning of Letter to a John in St. Paul by Sordid Affairs

The lyrics of the song "Letter to a John in St. Paul" by Sordid Affairs convey a sense of longing, disillusionment, and a search for escape from a monotonous and unsatisfying existence. The speaker describes being on their knees for so long, suggesting a position of submission or subservience. This could be seen as a metaphor for being trapped in a cycle of mundane and unfulfilling activities, represented by the imagery of kitchen tiles and hotel sheets.

The speaker craves acknowledgment and recognition, even if it comes in the form of being called mistress or chef. This implies a deep desire for validation and significance amidst a life that feels insignificant. They acknowledge that everything ultimately boils down to money, highlighting the shallow nature of their current situation.

The sense of longing intensifies as they express waiting for someone to turn a blind eye towards them, highlighting a desire to break free from the constraints and limitations they feel trapped within. They feel like they are living off scraps, suggesting a lack of fulfillment and dissatisfaction.

The speaker then reflects on their own journey of self-improvement, describing how they cleaned up their act and found a new scene. However, this transformation comes at a cost as they lose their friends and experience a sense of emptiness. This highlights the toll that personal growth and change can have on one's relationships and sense of belonging.

The song also touches on the theme of urban decay, conveying a sense of despair and disillusionment with the world around them. They question the worth of their current life and express a longing for something greater. The idea of a better home, symbolized by flowers and a lack of disease, represents an escape from their current reality.

Overall, the lyrics suggest that the speaker is searching for meaning and fulfillment in a life that feels empty and unfulfilling. They are yearning for freedom, validation, and a sense of purpose. The song serves as a reflection on the struggle to find genuine happiness and contentment in a world marked by mundanity and urban decay.